If there is one thing, just one sin that I still struggle with, I would have to say it is anger. For years being a consistently angry and aggressive person was my only line of defense. Eventually that anger landed me in jail many times and eventually charged with a highly militias crime.
Once I met Jesus He began to work in me, but the anger still sometimes rises to the top and becomes the thing I need to ask forgiveness for. Tonight an atheist pulled me lower than I've been since coming to Christ in 2009. I was so frustrated and angry that I began to spit back, and that my friends is NOT what Jesus would do.
Look, I am a leader in the world of Christianity, but this does not make me a perfect man....this actually puts me in the line of fire more than many others. Most, if not ALL of the time, I handle myself well and back off in silent prayer. Tonight was far from that truth. Tonight, a part of my old self came up and I found myself standing in front of this man ready to throw down. Then I thought of my wife and daughter and instead of throwing everything I had at this guy, I stepped back, got in my car and left.
About 10 minutes later I found myself at home in my driveway pondering on what Jesus would have done and after saying a short prayer and asking forgiveness of my God, I put the car back in drive and went back to the location this all went down at. When I pulled up, everyone looked at me like I was about to destroy everything in sight, and a few minutes earlier I wanted to. But this was my chance to redeem myself and be more like Jesus. So I walked right up to this guy, looked him in the eyes and said "I love you dude. You are loved. We may disagree and that's ok, but you are loved. Please forgive me."
He put out his hand and said we're all good. We shook hands and I said peace.
In ending, we all fall short and we all sin. But we must be consistent in practicing righteousness. It's not even possible because we are only made righteous through our Faith in Christ (Romans 5:1), but that DOES NOT mean we don't try. I made a mistake tonight and let my anger get the best of me, but because of my Faith in Jesus, I Praise God that I was able to redeem myself through seeking forgiveness and showing love.